the day after

Thanks for all of the birthday wishes! I had a wonderful day! Work was...work. But I picked the kids up, made some dinner (some italian sausage taken out of the casings and browned, added my favorite sauce, and pasta), had ice cream cake, and went to my Tea party. I had a blast, ordered some more tea (I heart tea!!), and signed up to have another tea party in the fall. Let me know if you are interested in coming! They are SO much fun!

On the down side, I woke up this morning with a UTI. SO not happy about this. Thanks for the wonderful birthday present! Oh well, at least it's early on, so I'm not in agony (yet). And I was able to get an appointment for this afternoon. Bah humbug.

32

Wow, I haven't posted in over a week! How did that happen?

Today is my 32nd birthday. I don't really feel any older, and am very glad that this past year is over. 31 was quite a challenge in many ways, but it has it's good moments too. I will have a whole post in the next day or so about the fact that exactly 1 year ago, I was waiting to hear about how my embryos were growing. And tomorrow is the 1 year "anniversary" of when I had Seth and his sibling transferred. But today I'm not thinking about that. Because today is my birthday! And it's a good day to celebrate!

This morning, I woke up to Seth at 5:30. His daddy went and got him (thank you!) and brought him into bed. After a diaper change (clearly stinky, and the reason why he woke up), he curled up in my arms, with my lips against his head, and he dozed off. The second I rolled away to get more comfortable, he started to stir, so I just held him, breathing him in, for another hour or so. I love that when he's fussy, all I have to do is put him on the bed with me, put an arm around him and put my face next to his, and he calms down almost immediately. He loves his mommy, and his mommy is in love with him.

Celia came to join the party around 7, and jumped on me to give me my birthday card. Now there's a story about this...Celia has been into secrets lately. At dinner last night, she whispered in my ear that she helped her daddy make my card (write it out), and it had a doggy on it. She told me it was a secret, and not to tell her daddy that she told me. I laughed, and pretended I didn't hear it. This morning, she hands me the envelope, and says that it's my doggy card, and reminds me that she told me about it last night and that it was still a secret. She's too sweet. She then mentioned that she was excited to have my birthday cake, to which I told her that we were waiting for cake until Friday. Since my and Nathan's birthdays are 4 days apart, we figured we'd do one cake Friday instead of 2 separate cakes. She was so upset by this, that she started crying and saying how you have to have birthday cake on your birthday! She didn't understand that we wanted to wait and combine our birthdays. So I'll be picking up an ice cream cake tonight on my way home. We'll have some tonight, and some on Sunday, for Nathan's birthday.

My present was awesome! I've been eagerly awaiting the release of the new Guitar Hero- Aerosmith game, which comes out on Sunday. So my darling husband got me a gift certificate to TRU for the game. He's so cute too, because he wrote the card out to: Our Guitar Hero, From your adoring fans, for One chance to play (or something like that). He made me smile, that's for sure! And I just saw that the full set list was released, and now I really can't wait to get my hands on the game!

Tonight, I even get a bit of a break after dinner! I had a Tea party back in January. And every year, the consultant has a "hostess appreciation" tea, where she thanks all of her hostesses for having parties. So I get to go, and have a nice evening with adults while Nathan gets the kids in bed. I'm really looking forward to it!

water

Apparently there was a huge water main break in my county today, affecting my house, office, and my kids day care. I got into work and was relieved when my hubby logged into skype, because it meant he made it into work (or that day care was open). I did, however, get a phone call at noon, saying that day care was closing at 1, and that until the water situation is safe, they will remain closed. So now I get to wait and see what happens, and will find out tomorrow morning when we call to see if they're open or not. While it's not an ideal situation, and timing isn't great (lots of stuff to do at work), at least I do get to spend a little extra time with the kids. As I type, Seth is asleep on the couch next to me, and Celia is watching Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. I forgot how great that show is! I haven't seen it in YEARS, and Celia loves it as much as I did when I was little. And it's not nearly as obnoxious as Dora.

Oh my!

I came home a bit early so I could take Celia to a summer festival they're having at her preschool, and I happened to stop home first since I was early. I had to stop at target first to get swimmy diapers for the baby so we can go to the pool party today too. Anyways, I stopped home so I could go to the bathroom, and get a little work done before the festival starts. I just got off the phone with my GPs office. And guess what? She's announced today that she's leaving the practice AND retiring from medicine!! I happen to LOVE this doctor, so I'm NOT happy about this at all. I suppose it's good for her, she has 2 kids and will be able to actually spend time with them (yes, I'm jealous!). But sucky for me. I had to reschedule my appointment with her in August with another doc in the group. Really a huge bummer. I hate it when you find a doc that you click with and they decide to retire. Mind you, she's young. Wonder what happened here.

almost friday

Thank goodness the weekend is almost here! This has been one of the longest weeks I've had in a long time. I can't wait to relax, get some sleep, and be with my kids this weekend.

Tuesday was a BAD day. It started off OK enough. Got up, showered (while listening to Cake, got into work, and got my day started. Then about an hour later, I felt like I had hit a brick wall. I wasn't sick, just really down. Out of nowhere. I just sat there, in my cube, shocked at how horrible I felt all of a sudden. I managed to get through the rest of the day, and actually be productive. But that pit in stomach, heavy hearted feeling just kept getting worse. I picked the kids up, made dinner, and then sat on the sofa for the rest of the night. I think there was TV on, and maybe I played some Guitar Hero, but I really don't remember. I was not in a good place at all. I just felt like I'd never be able to climb out of it. I did talk with Nathan a little about how I was feeling, and how frustrating it is. But it didn't really help. Thankfully, I woke up the next morning, feeling much better. Not perfect, and still a bit anxious and down. But better. Today, I was fine. I'm really hoping that the increased dose of meds helped balance me out, and that it was just a jolt to my system when I took the extra. I have no idea.

In an effort to do something for myself, I went to a knitting group last night that I hooked up with on Ravelry. It was a great group of women, and I had a really nice time. I did leave a little early though, because I felt guilty leaving Nathan alone with the kids for the extra time on a work night. Next time I'll stay longer.

At least today I'm feeling a lot better. Just really tired, because Seth had me up at 2 last night, and I couldn't fall asleep again until 4. Makes sleeping a full night hard. Hopefully tonight he'll let me.

too cute

I took this last week, and posted it on my Knitting blog, but just realized I didn't post it here! Here's my guy- he's been such a happy boy lately! We had a 20 minute conversation this morning, all in goos and gaas and agaas, it was SO cute!


Notice the shirt- I got this from Mel's Cafepress store. My guy is a work of ART for sure! I have gotten SO many compliments on it- great design Mel!

hot!!

My god it's been hot in DC! I walked out of work this afternoon and had an instant head ache. Not fun!

Had my appointment with my GP this morning, and we've doubled my dose of Lex.apro. I'm hoping it helps. Really hoping. Thankfully it should. I go back in 2 months to see how I'm doing. It was interesting though, because we also went over the bloodwork that I had done last week. Most of it was pretty good, and there weren't really any surprises. I'm still a bit anemic, my cholesterol/triglycerides are a little high, but not alarmingly so. And my fasting blood sugar was high. Not diabetic levels, but high. She said to get some exercise, and then before my next appointment we'll get another blood draw done (for the Hemoglobin A1C), to see how that looks. Then we'll decide how to proceed. She said focus on getting exercise, and not to worry as much about losing weight yet. That one thing at a time is better, and she doesn't want me to take on too much. She's there to help me prioritize, and that it's most important to start getting exercise. I had said that I was going to join Weight Watchers last week, but that I had gotten pulled into a conference call before I was going to go (which is true), and it just didn't happen between meetings (which is also true). She said that while she usually is a strong believer in WW, that at this point, she would rather me take that one hour and exercise each week. That right now, it's more important to get other things on track (anxiety and depression), and that exercise will help with all of those things. So, I'm going to put WW on the back burner for now. And focus on exercise, and spending as much time with the kids as I can.

My aunt is not doing well. She has more tumors than they initially thought. And they're thinking that, depending on how she reacts to the treatment she's getting right now, the time frame is somewhere between three weeks and a few months. Sad, but I hate knowing that someone I know and love is suffering. I wish the cancer would just disappear and she'd be fine, but that's not going to happen. So now I'm really just hoping that she doesn't have to suffer too much.

Thanks

Thanks so much for your support guys. Really, it means so much! My aunt seems to be doing a little better. I called my dad on Wednesday, and he was still at the hospital, and she even wanted to say hi!! So I got to talk to her for a few minutes. In reality, she sounded absolutely horrible. But I would have been shocked if she sounded good. So it's still pretty touch and go, and we have no idea what's going to happen yet. I'm praying for her constantly, either for her to get past this and keep fighting, or for her to not be in any pain anymore. I did call my brother yesterday and tell him what was going on, which was really hard for me to do. My brother and my dad's side of the family has a lot of tension since he and my father do not speak. He hasn't spoken to my aunt since my wedding, either (and that was 6 years ago). She was not invited to his wedding. I was glad to hear that he wanted to be kept in the loop, and was sad to hear that she's not doing well.

Yesterday was fun. I was at work, when the power went off at 10. It was off for over an hour, when they told us we could go home. Kind of hard to get ANYTHING done when your job is 100% on the computer, and the only thing you could work on was a laptop that had a battery that was running out, and you can't really start any jobs on the main grid, not knowing if it's stable. Gotta love that. So, at least I got to spend a quiet afternoon at home with my husband (who was home sick again). He's still home today, and still sick. I woke up this morning feeling a bit funny in my head, so I'm hoping it's just caffeine withdrawl, and that I'll be fine after the coffee kicks in. Otherwise I'll be enjoying the weekend from my bed with a fever for 3 days. Not my idea of a good time.

Therapy on Wednesday was also good. I'm impressed that I made it there, since we had a huge storm, and all the power was out. Thankfully she has a window in her office, so we were still able to meet. It was really helpful, and she's even more thinking that I need to have my meds adjusted a bit. So I'll talk to my GP about that on monday. She even said to have the GP call her if she wanted to talk to her about things. Kind of nice. I've definitely been having a few dark days here and there, and most days have several dark hours. I am really looking forward to the weekend though! I can't wait to get some SLEEP!

sad.

Along with everything else I've been sad about lately, I received some bad news on Monday. My aunt Debbie, who has had breast cancer (and has spread to several other locations) for the last 11 years, is in the hospital. Apparently she has a tumor that is growing around an artery, causing some bleeding. She went into the hospital, and we're not sure what's going on. My dad went down to Miami yesterday, to be with her. My uncle (her husband) had called him and told him to get down there ASAP. It's not looking good. My aunt is amazing, she's fought for 11 years. I hope she can fight a bit longer, but it's not looking good.

finally better

Celia is finally better! She had her fever through Friday, and is finally back to normal today. Even though her fever broke Friday, she was still pretty cranky and miserable through the weekend. She managed to fall and split her lip on Saturday, as well as fall on the stairs outside and scrape her leg pretty nicely. Poor clumsy kid.

I had an OK weekend- got to see the Sex and the City movie on Saturday- I went by myself after we got back from Butlers Orchard where we went strawberry picking. It was really great and I'm so glad I got to see it! After that, I took Celia shopping with me, so I could get a few things from Lush and JJill. I even let Celia pick out a few bath bombs for herself, which she was very excited about. We used one of them last night, which was fun! It's nice to be able to take baths again!

Other things are alright, but not great. I've been in a funk, which I haven't really been able to pull myself out of. The meds are helping, but not enough at this point. They should be in full effect by now, but I'm still having rough days. My therapist is really helping a lot, which is awesome! But she also thinks that my meds may need to be increased. I see my GP next monday, so we'll see how that goes. I've just been in a bad place, which is why I haven't really posted as much (who wants to hear someone who has 2 healthy kids complain about not being happy?!).

On the plus side, Secret Pal 12 (a knitting swap I've hostessed the previous 5 rounds of) starts soon!! Signups close today, so I get to focus on sorting out everyone and handing groups off to other hostesses to match up and manage. I can't wait! I'm still looking through the list deciding on who I want to spoil, which is always fun. Trying to get back into some of the things I love doing. I spent some time knitting this weekend, and spun up a bunch of fiber that I got at Maryland Sheep and Wool festival. I'll try to post pics of that stuff tonight if I remember.