Exciting times

While I'm a little sad about the loss of #2, I'm pretty relieved that baby#1 is thriving! I'm just so relieved to know that he/she has a heartbeat. First of many steps. I'm so glad that my OB was able to squeeze me in for monday already. Nathan decided he doesn't think he'll be useful, so he's going to let me go it alone. Which is fine with me. I'll be insisting on another ultrasound soon, so he'll go to that. I hope. I'm trying to see the good side of all of this. Thankfully we'll have 1 baby...provided all else goes well. 1 is easier than 2. 1 is less expensive than 2. 1 does not require a new vehicle. 1 will be easier on me and he/she during the pregnancy. 1 will be easier on Celia once he/she gets here. 1 baby is a lot easier to nurse than 2. While I'm not completely insistent on nursing (it was a horrible experience with Celia), I'd like to try it again. Plus it helps with the risk of gestational diabetes. The Metformin can help reduce that chance, but wtih twins, and twice the placentas, that would be much harder to avoid. See, lots of positive things!

I think this will be best for all of us. And, even though I'm NOT very religious, I do believe, or at least hope that, there is a God, and that he/she knows best.

Since we had great ultrasound photos, and the tech did a fabulous job of creating them for us (yup, she put text on the images, so we have little messages from baby). One of them was specifically for Celia, and it said "Hi Celia! Will you be my big sister??"
So last night, I put it in a small frame, and wrapped it up. After her snack, we gave her the picture to open, and explained what was going on. She was so excited! She kept saying that she's going to have a brother. Not a sister, but a brother. And keeps referring to the baby as "he" and a "boy" and "my brother!!". She asked to see where the baby is, so I showed her my belly, and she said that she couldn't see it yet. Really cute. This morning, "grabbed" something from my belly, and pretended that she was running around holding her brother. It was absolutely adorable. I'm not sure she really gets it, but it was so much fun to tell her what was going on. And now this explains why I won't pick her up and why I'm so tired.

Good news and bad news.

The good news, is that we have one embryo has a strong heartbeat and measured exactly at 7 weeks 1 day! The bad news is that the second embryo measured at 6 weeks 2 days, and had no heartbeat. So it looks like we're just having 1 baby. I'm actually pretty OK with this news, though am a little sad. I guess I'm still not sure how I feel about it in all honesty. But I am excited that we did get to see one good, solid heartbeat! Yeah!

EDITED:
I graduated today too!! I'm no longer a patient of SGF. I called my OB as soon as I got back from lunch, and they were able to get me in NEXT MONDAY!! So I only have to wait a week to get in. They don't do sonos at my OBs office, but I'm going to insist on one, so I can make sure the second baby is reabsorbing, and not continuing to grow. If it's growing, I'm not sure how that effects things.

new clothes.

Yesterday I ended up going shopping for some new clothes. My "regular" clothes are all too tight, with the exception of 1 pair of shorts, 1 pair of jeans, and a few shirts. I hit a few stores, and got a few things, plus a maternity shirt and shorts. And, today I spent a few hours going thru my closet, getting a bunch of stuff ready to donate, toss out the things that aren't wearable, and organize a bit better. It looks fantastic. And in the process, I pulled out my maternity clothes and washed them all. I didn't remember half of what I had, so it was good. I'm glad I got a cute short sleeved top and shorts. Everything I have is long sleeve and jeans, with the exception of 3 t-shirts. The downfall to being pregnant and showing in the late fall/winter is that you can't find any cute short sleeved tops. They're all solid colors and boring. I think I may have to place an order at oldnavy.com or gap.com for a few as soon as their summer stuff goes on sale. If I'm already out of most of my regular clothes, I'm sure the maternity stuff isn't too far behind. And it's still HOT here in September/October.

Yesterday morning I looked at a 2004 Honda Odyssey. It was really nice, fully loaded with DVD, navigation system, leather seats, really beautiful. Not sure if we need all the bells and whistles though. And it had some stains in the carpet and usual wear and tear. I am such a snob about cars. I've always had new cars. My first real car was a new saturn that I leased in grad school. Then came my Honda CR-V, which I LOVE. Again, new. I have always had issues with other peoples things, and a car is so personal. It just really grosses me out to be driving someone elses car. But we really can't afford a new one, unless we stretch a bit. I'm trying to get used to the idea of a used car. Really! I've just been lucky so far. Thankfully my car is in great shape (just a little dirty), so I should get a good trade for it. But not enough to make a new car easy. Thankfully I just got a bonus at work, (I've been there for 5 years), so that will go towards the mini van. Anyway, I still want to check out a Toyota Sienna, and see how that one is. They seem to be rated the highest on Consumer Reports.

I'm so nervous about the ultrasound tomorrow. Really nervous. I'm terrified that the sacs will be empty. Or that they won't have heart beats. I just hope that I didn't jinx myself by washing all of my maternity clothes, and being so optimistic.

bloated!!

I feel SO bloated today. I ended up having Panera for lunch today (french onion soup and half a grilled cheese...YUMMY!). The person in charge of internships at work was out today, and she asked me to sit in on the college intern's lunch, which is brown bag. So I figured the best place to go was Panera! And just my luck, no one had food with them at the lunch, so we just went around the room and chatted a bit, and I let them go early. I had a few questions for them, but there were supposed to be like 15 people, not just 4! At least I did it, and it was nice to see how much they really are benefiting from the internship.

Anyway, talk about a change of subject! I'm sitting here, working away, and my stomach feels like it's growing every minute. Since I had my C-section with my daughter, parts of my abdomen are numb. Not comletely, but if you scratch it, it just feels a little numb and tingly. It's very strange to have the bloating pushing against a numb abdomen. It will be really cool to see what it feels like once the babies are moving!

I'm SO glad it's friday. I'm spending most of the weekend relaxing, sleeping, and relaxing some more. Nice and peaceful. I can't wait!!! Then monday is the sonogram. At 10:30. I'm nervous about it, but looking forward to it too.

MMMmmmmmm.

Have I said that Mamma Lucia has the BEST pizza? It doesn't compare to the stuff I can get in Buffalo, but this stuff is AMAZING. I got myself 2 pieces (I dont' care how much fat/calories it has), and a root beer, and I'm sitting high on cloud 9 right now.

lunch.

So I'm finally getting used to the idea of twins. It will be quite a ride, but I know that I can handle anything.

The symptoms come on stronger every few days, and this morning, the thought of breakfast made me ill. So I had milk, and some grapes when I got to work. So far so good. Now I'm getting hungry, which is great. But I have NO idea what I want!! Thankfully I work right across the street from this fabulous plaza with a ton of restaurants. But nothing sounds good! Then everything sounds good! I could go to Mamma Lucia for pizza, an Asian place (has Japanese, Chineese and Thai), Cheeburger Cheeburger, Panera, Wing Stop, Moby Dick, Chipotle, Jerry's Subs and Pizza, or Safeway for food. And of course, Krispy Kreme or Starbucks for coffee/sweets. I can tell you right now, this pregnancy is a lot like my last in the form of cravings. Last time I couldn't go into Chipotle or any Chineese places because of the smell of the food. It killed my appetite on contact. The other day we had Baja Fresh for lunch, and realized that the same thing is happening. Something about the smell of chargrilled chicken that makes me feel pretty crappy. I think today will be a slice of pizza from Mamma Lucia. I love their pizza, and love that I can just grab a slice or two for under $5, and I'll be stuffed when I'm done eating. It's just so hot, that walking across the street does not sound like fun. But this morning, I couldn't find anything appetizing in my entire house.

Anyway, aside from the food issues, I'm still exhausted. I closed my eyes last night after dinner (I was supposed to give Celia a bath and put her to bed), and ended up passed out. Celia woke me up around 7 to take a bath with her. Thankfully I talked her into taking a shower instead. Much faster. Nathan and I have been needing to sit and talk, and figure out what the heck to do, but I passed out before I had the chance to even think about it.

Here is the big stuff:
We need a mini van. I've done the research, and found that the Honda Odyssey is the one we're going to get. But I can't make a decision like that without showing him why my research is going that way. Aside from the fact that we both drive Hondas now and love them, it really seems to be one of the better mini vans to buy used.

We need to figure out if I'm going to be able to stay home with the babies after they are born. Or if we need to hire a nanny. Or what to do? Part of me thinks I'd go nuts being a stay at home mom. The other part of me wants to actually raise the children I've worked so hard to have. I don't want someone else doing my job. Financially- what's possible?

Again financially- Do we stay in the DC area? Or do we move back up to Western New York? It will be a huge challenge not having family close by (my SIL and her hubby lives about an hour and a half away, and after that, the nearest family is a 7 hour drive). However, I have friends who have already offered to help. And my SIL said that she'd be around as much as we needed her to be. She's just amazing!

Then there's loads of small things flying thru my head. I have no idea how I'm feeling or what I'm thinking. Then I realize that we havne't seen heartbeats yet. We dont' know if both gestational sacs are viable. I hope they are, but there's always that chance. There's no sense in worrying about it until we know everything. I've alwyas been a proactive person though, I need to have a plan. Realistically, we have 8 months before the babies come. 8 months to make some pretty big decisions. I have no idea what we're going to do, but it will be an interesting ride.

Oh My!

Just got back from my first OB ultrasound. I'm exactly 6 weeks. And, there were 2 sacs. When they went to look at both sacs, you could see a little blip in each one, but they said that next week we'll see much more.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around this, but it looks like we're having twins! Holy shit, is life going to change.

Home at last!!

I just got home, after a long, and amazing day with an old neighbor, his foster son, and his brother. He moved to Quantico about a year and a half ago, and hoped to foster and eventually adopt 3 boys. He has his first permanent placement, who is 14, and quite a sweet boy. It was fun to watch Celia with an older boy, running around and playing. We also took a boat ride on the Potomac, which was absolutely amazing. We all got sun, had loads of fun, and now I'm going to lay in bed, and open to the first page of the new Harry Potter book. I've been waiting for this moment for years, and I can't believe it's finally here!!

damn tastebuds!!

2 weeks ago, I spent 2 hours at Let's Dish, preparing meals for my family. I picked the 8 meal deal, and split 7 of them, ending up wtih 15 total meals. Last night, we tried the first one, Firecracker Chicken Tenders with sweet potato fries. Let me tell you how yummy it was!! I loved it.

Tonight's selection was pork tenderloin with an apricot chile glaze. I took 2 bites of it and couldn't eat it. I'm not sure if it was the pork, or something in the glaze, but I really couldn't eat it. So I moved onto my salad, mixed greens with cheese and crutons, and balsamic vinegrette. Blech!! I ate about 1/8th of it, then took another bite and it was just all bad. Something in the dressing (it's Newman's Own, which I really love!), just didn't work for me. At least the potatoes (baby reds, boiled, drained with a little salt, butter and fresh thyme), and corn bread (from a mix) was good. So that was my dinner. I'm so sad, because I was really hungry when I sat down!! Now I'm here, checking my e-mail and bloglines, and I'm hungry. But does anything in this house sound appetizing?? NO! Of course not!!

Garlic.

Yes garlic. Some people love it, others hate it. I tolerate it pretty well. It has its place. I love me some garlic salt on popcorn. And a little garlic in some dishes. But when there are big chunks in it, or it's something overly garlic-y (like garlic mashed potatoes), I really dislike it. When I was pregnant with my daughter, by the time the second trimester started, I coudn't stand to be in the vicinity of garlic. That included in its raw, cooked, or breath form. My poor husband would go out for chineese food, and I would run away from him. Yell at him to open the windows in the car when I was with him (it was that potent!), cringe if he breathed on me, and push him over once he was asleep so he wouldn't contaminate my pillow. It was really bad. And I could smell garlic on him for DAYS after he had eaten it. Literally, days. After I had my daughter, that went away for the most part, but in all honesty, strong garlic smell was never something I was fond of, and was always sensitive to.

Yesterday, as I was walking briskly to the restroom (darn that bottle of orange gatorade!), I noticed the overpowering odor of garlic coming from an office down the hall. I walked by, held my breath, and made it into the bathroom without any issues. Thank goodness I am not a puker (at least not yet!). It was BAD. Then, last night, my husband came in and was telling me about his meeting at work, and he gave me a kiss. Wow did it knock my socks off! And not in a good way. I told him it was again time to avoid garlic, and he was confused- he had only had pizza for lunch. Poor guy, it's so early in the pregnancy, and I'm already repulsed by garlic (which means him by association). Blech. It's funny though. Because some people can eat a whole head of garlic, and be fine. My poor hubby will eat a clove, and it will stay with him for days. I wish I knew why that happened!

symptoms...

It's barely 11AM, and I'm STARVING!! I feel like my stomach is a pit some times, I can't get enough in there. Then dinner comes, and the last thing I want to do is eat. Last night, we went to 5 Guys Burgers and Fries for dinner (at the request of Celia), I ate a small burger and some fries, and by the time I was ready for bed, my stomach was a pit again! I was so tired I didnt' want to get up and get some crackers or something, but I definitely thought about it. I hate being hungry all the time. It's just really annoying!!

DH let me sleep in this morning, until just after 7:30, which was SO nice!! I apparently really needed it after waking up 5 times last night to pee. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining...I love that I have all of these symptoms, and that I really feel pregnant (and my pants agree with that- most of my jeans and pants don't fit. Already...though I'm not sure if it's due to the IVF meds or the pregnancy).

Another thing- I had to wear shorts to work today- jean shorts. Because my jeans that actually fit comfortably went in the wash last night, and when hubby woke up this morning he neglected to put them in the dryer. The only other pants I have right now are cords, which I would rather not wear in 90 degree weather.

Off to eat my unhealthy ham and cheese Hot Pocket. It was the only thing at the grocery store the other day that didn't make me want to gag.

Still rising!

My level this morning was at 4641. Since average doubling time is between 2-3 days, we're all good. My first OB sonogram is scheduled with my actual RE on Monday July 23rd, just 1 week away!

I'm so relieved. So far so good.

paranoid!

Last night, as I was falling asleep, I felt a twinge on my right side. That was the beginning of a very restless night of sleep. Thankfully it didn't seem to be anything, other than normal stretching/moving, but it freaked me out! Every time I fell asleep, I'd wake up a few minutes later. One of the wierd things I really remember from my first pregnancy was that whenever I had to go to the bathroom, my right side ached. I drank a huge bottle of gatorade last night as we were watching our movie. Big mistake! I kept having to pee, and then I'd get up and I'd be achey on my right side, from having to pee. It was really frustrating, because I just had this horrible feeling that something was wrong. So far, everything is fine thankfully. I guess I"m just being paranoid. I'll find out for sure tomorrow if anything is wrong, since I get my third beta in the morning. My fingers are crossed, and I'm pretty sure that everything is fine. I just can't shake the fear.

Good start.

Kid-heavy post...fyi.

My weekend started off well yesterday! My hubby and I went to lunch, and as we were ordering, my cell rang with the results. My nurse was so happy to tell me that my beta doubled, exactly, which is great! After lunch, we went to see "The Order Of The Phoenix", which was absolutely fabulous! I loved it, and thought it was extremely well done. After that, we picked up Celia, and went to a friend's house in Damascus, where we had dinner and went to a local parade, and fireworks! It was Celia's first time seeing fireworks, and she really loved them. There's nothing like seeing a kid experience something like Fireworks for the first time, I was nearly in tears watching her. I truly hope that all of you get to have that experience soon. There's really nothing like it. Then today we ran errands, which was so productive, but exhausting. We got Celia her haircut (she has been wanting one since I got mine done at the lake last week). It took 3 stores to find her water shoes that are closed toe (impossible to find, let me tell you!), so she can participate in splash day at day care. Apparently they won't let the kids participate without them, and the only place I found them that were closed toe were at Stride rite. At least they were on sale.

Enough kid talk...now on to symptoms.

Something wierd I've noticed- my "morning sickness" really isn't in the morning. It's in the evening. If anything, I'm famished in the morning, and can eat tons of food. But by dinner time, I really don't want to eat. I actually had to force myself to eat dinner tonight, and I"ve been pretty blech since then. And I'm exhausted all the time. We were possibly getting together with my inlaws today (they're going to Assateague Island in Maryland, and wanted to hook up. I was pretty sure I wasn't going so I could relax and run some errands, but thankfully it never materialized. My MIL wouldn't commit to a time, or place (either Harrisburg or Baltimore...that's quite a big difference, WTF!!). I like to have plans settled for a weekend in advance so I can plan. I have limited time to do things, and I can't just "wait and see" what may or may not happen. Errands need to be run, food needs to be bought, yardwork/housework needs to be done, and we all need a little down time. Last night, after 9, they finally decided to just skip it. I just don't have the time/patience to deal with that crap right now. Sorry if I'm sounding bitchy, it just really pisses me off when people expect us to drop everything for a whole morning/afternoon to do something, that would involve us driving 3 hours round trip (a week after spending 7 hours in the car), for an hour. There are 2 ways to get to where they were going. If they really wanted to see us, they could have taken the one that drives RIGHT BY OUR FUCKING HOUSE. At least I got my weekend back. And today was so productive, that it makes up for the flip/flopping of when/where to meet. Ok...I obviously need to go to bed, I'm being a complete asshole.

perfect!

beta today was at 1864. Dead on doubling time of 2 days. More later!!

Amazing.

Thank you so much for all of your comments and support! It really helps so much having a community out there of people who understand how it feels to go through IVF, and IF, and the uncertainty and fear of it working/not working. It's still so early, but I'm really hopeful. I'm not sure if it's because I really feel pregnant, or because I'm just happy to have good results for once, but whatever it is, I feel hopeful. Like I might actually come home with a baby (or 2) in 9 months. And I hope to be able to celebrate great betas with each and every one of you!


And to the ladies of the Braces Bunch, who have sent cards and letters recently- thank you!! I will be buying some stationary this weekend and sending out a batch to you all this weekend. You all rock!!

I'm still not so sure that the high HCG means anything. I keep reading online, and some sites say it could mean multiples, and others say that HCG can't imply that at all. So for now, I'm trying to be open to the possibility, and wait until the ultrasound before starting to think about how we'll handle it.

On another note, I stopped by the pharmacy on my way home to get my progesterone sopositories, and apparently it needed a pre-authorization from my insurance company so they didn't have it ready. The pharmacist was SO nice, and came over and asked me if I needed it NOW, or if I was planning ahead. I mentioned that I needed to take it last night (my PIO was gone...bone dry), and he kindly went over and grabbed a box for me. Apparently the script was for 3 boxes, and he asked if it was OK to give me 1 box now, and then 2 later after it went thru. I almost hugged him! He then asked me if I was expecting, and when I said yes, he shook my hand and said a big Congratulations to me. It's so nice to have great people to deal with. It really makes all the difference. Then I got into the car, and there was a commercial for a concert (Guster), who is playing at Wolf Trapp at the end of the month. I love Guster, and really want to go, but it's mid-week, which is so hard to pull off. I immediately started crying because I want to go, but shouldn't, and I was so touched by the kindness of the pharmacist, and the good news from my beta, that I just lost it. It really felt good to let it out though.

Holy shit!!!

Yeah, I'm definitely pregnant!! Want to know what my beta was this morning? 937!!! My nurse was SO happy, and asked if I felt any different and that stuff. No wonder I was feeling so freaking exhausted! Anyways, I go in for my second beta on friday, and a third one on monday. I'm so excited to have confirmation from them!! Now I can start to believe it!!

Oh, and I'm 15 days past 3 day transfer.

Waiting again!

I just had my blood drawn, and now I have to wait for the phone call. From the second I sat in the chair, I've been terrified and SO nervous! I have no idea how I"m going to get thru the morning with getting something productive done. I have SO much work to do from last week, and a presentation tomorrow that I need to prepare for. But I can't focus, and I feel like the butterflies in my stomach are fighting with each other. I hope they don't wait until 4 to call!! The sooner the better.

tired!

I don't remember being this tired this early on before! I can barely peel myself out of bed in the morning, and by 2, I'm falling asleep at my desk. Not such a good thing! I can't wait until I get my beta results tomorrow. I did take another test this morning (I went 2 whole days without one!), and it again was positive again. I'm trying to believe it, but am having such a hard time. It's so early!

I had a nice lunch with a friend today. She knows what we're going thru, and she actually experienced a loss at 12 weeks last year, and finally started trying again. She asked me if I had any results yet, and I told her. She was so happy, and told me that she's pregnant too, by about 6 weeks. I am so excited for her!! I know she was really torn about trying again after last time, but I'm so glad she did.

Another fun thing this week- I keep finding out that more people are leaving at work. Some to go to the same place as many of the others, some to other places. I'm kind of bummed, because most of the friends I go to lunch with on occaision, or get coffee with, or go for walks with are leaving. I'm the only one left. And I'm thinking it might be time to start actually looking for another job, but everything else, I don't want to start over again. I need to have FMLA in place so I can take my 12 weeks and not risk losing my job. I really don't have any sick/vacation time right now (thanks to a toddler who loves to contract viruses and bring them home), so that's not a concern. But the Short Term Disability gives me 5 weeks pay. And we have a 2 week parental leave that we get when we have babies (for dads too, which is so cool). And in the long run, I'd rather be working part time, but I cannot find ANYTHING part time. At least my resume is somewhat updated, in case I do find something to apply for. I keep telling myself that I'm safe here unless I hear otherwise. Which I haven't. I don't know...I guess I'm just rambling.

Back from vacation!

We had a great time up in the Finger Lakes! Great weather, great food, and lots of relaxing. I've POAS nearly every day, and every one has come up positive faster, and has been darker. I'm finally starting to really believe that I'm pregnant. Now I really wasn't going to POAS at all. I figured I'd wait until we got home from vacation, so I didn't ruin it. But then on sunday when we got into Canandaigua, and we ate dinner, I finished 3/4 of a huge hamburger and ate the fries. Then monday, I was STARVING every time I turned around, and had eaten regularly. Tuesday, I was so exhausted, that I took a 3 hour nap in the afternoon! We were going to grill pizzas for dinner, and I couldn't get the energy to do it. Not that the wasps nest on the grill didn't help that one, but I was definitely tired. I was so relieved when we decided to just go out instead. Then there were the twinges. I remember the odd feeling when I was about 8 weeks pregnant last time, and my uterus would just cramp at odd times. Not badly, just wierdly. Usually when I really had to go to the bathroom, or when I had been laying down and then got up suddenly. That was happening on monday and tuesday too. So when I was at Wegmans, I felt the need to grab a pack of tests and see what happened.

It's so different this time! I'm noticing things a lot sooner. And then there is the fear that it won't work. Last time the second the second line appeared, I jumped up and down, hugged my hubby, and called my mom, my friends, and a few other people. I told friends at work right away. This time I'm terriffied to do it! What if I have a miscarriage? What if something's wrong? I'm hoping that I'll feel better once I hear the Beta numbers on wednesday. But I'm really not sure! I'm so afraid to believe that it's real, because if something happens, I"ll be crushed. We alredy decided not to tell Celia what's going on until I'm visably pregnant. Then there's the nervousness that it could be twins. They put 2 in, we know that at least 1 took. And that the third good embryo made it to freeze. I have no idea what the odds are. I knew the odds of a 2 blast transfer, which we would have opted for 1 (my husband's decision, not mine), but of 2 on a 3-day transfer, I have no idea. I guess we'll find out soon enough. For now, I'm thrilled that I'm pregnant! I'm feeling OK, but really tired. And I'm trying not to stress over the possibility of there being 2 babys in there, but trying to get comfortable with the idea of it being a real possibility. It would be amazing to actually end up with a baby in 9 months! The fun thing, is that he/she will be born around the same time as Celia's birthday, and my wedding anniversary. Very cool! Ok...that was my excitement for today. Now I go back to being guarded. ;)

It's still there!

And darker! I was debating on whether to POAS this morning or not, and when my DD woke me up at 5am, I didn't even think about it. We swapped at 7, so I could get another hour and a half sleep, and after I woke up I couldn't resist. So it was really only 2 hours since I had gone to the bathroom before, but the test came up positive, I could see a line right away, and it was definitely darker than yesterday. Still lighter than the "positive control", but definitely a bit darker.

Could this have actually worked on the first try?! I'm still not believing it since it's SO early, and anything could happen. But for now, I'm happy!

Holy shit.

Yesterday, we went to wegmans for some Wasp spray (there is a wasp nest on my uncle's grill, making it impossible to use, so we decided to kill it. While looking for tylenol (I had a headache, and forgot mine at home), I walked by the pregnancy tests. I grabbed a box, and figured I"d wait until friday to see if anything was happening. So this morning, I wake up and feel the need to at least try, figuring it would still be negative anyways, then I'd know the Ovi.drel was out of my system. So I POAS, and set it on the floor. I wash my hands and go back to it, and it looks like it's still blank, until I pick it up. There was a faint line there!! It got a little darker after a few minutes, but it was definitely there.

Now I've looked online, and tried figuring out how long the Ovi.drel stays in your system, and it looks like it's about 10-12 days after the trigger shot. It's been 14 days since my trigger. 12 days since ER, and 10 days since transfer. I'm not getting too optimistic that it's a real positive yet, but it's at least nice to see that second line!! I have gone back into the bathroom about 100 times and looked at it to make sure it's still there...and it is.

After I saw the second line, I went into the bedroom and had a funny look on my face. I told hubby what I saw, and he grabbed me and hugged me. I think it's the first time through this that I saw how much he really does want this too. It was nice. I still will be taking more tests over the next few days to see if the line gets darker (or goes away). I'm afraid to believe it, but I'll be walking around with a smile on my face today for sure!

cryopres. report

We just got the cryopreservation report! Of the 3 left, 1 was of the initial 3 that were mature, adn that one made it!! The other two stalled. I take this as good, because the 2 they put in were at the same quality as the 1 that made it. Yay!!

waiting sucks!

It's been over a week since the retrieval now, and I'm finally feeling close to normal. I'm so glad that it doesn't ache to move any more! However, at the wedding last night, I did a bit of dancing and was SO sore. Today we got to our vacation house, which is awesome! My uncle is letting us stay at his house on the lake, and it's really great. I got to take a jacuzzi bath and relax all night! Now, I'm just sitting here, watching food network and thinking about how I've been feeling the last few days.

My boobs hurt. A lot. Could be worse, but definitely hurting lot. They feel more brick-like than normal. Then there's the stiffness in my abdomen. I feel it every time I move. Some mild cramping, but very different than normal cramps. And my appetite is huge. I've been hungry constantly over the last few days. I'm sure it's all just due to the hormones, but I thought I'd mention them just in case they mean something.